1. Good mystery show tonight - good audience, nice feedback.
2. Good Odyssey meeting this afternoon - no injuries, everyone there, got a lot done.
3. Good haircuts for the kiddos this morning. Cinderella's is up to her shoulders - she's been begging to get it cut, and loves it!
4. No mail today, for some reason. And yes, I've decided to count that as a blessing.
5. Scooby and I are now reading "The Black Cauldren." I LOVE sharing my favorite books with my kids!
Saturday, February 28, 2009
Friday, February 27, 2009
Late things
Late post tonight - I went out for a "work" meeting at a beer joint. We were supposed to be working on paperwork for Odyssey, but it just turned into a bitch session. With beer. The most fun meeting I've been to yet!
So, no list today. I'm tired. Although probably not as tired as Steve, who seems to be treating the whole Vegas experience as one long sleep-deprivation experiment. I got off the phone with him today and Scooby asked me, "So WHO's torturing Uncle Steve?" Hard to explain, really.
Scooby had mandatory baseball "tryouts" tonight, so the coaches could "draft" their teams. Pretty painful. He wasn't very happy afterwards. This will be the make or break year for baseball, I think.
Tarzan's reading, and greatly enjoying, the "Captain Underpants" books. I managed to steer Scooby away from them, but no such luck with Mr. Independence! He decided to strip down yesterday and BE Captain Underpants for awhile. Of course, he's been doing that for awhile...
So, no list today. I'm tired. Although probably not as tired as Steve, who seems to be treating the whole Vegas experience as one long sleep-deprivation experiment. I got off the phone with him today and Scooby asked me, "So WHO's torturing Uncle Steve?" Hard to explain, really.
Scooby had mandatory baseball "tryouts" tonight, so the coaches could "draft" their teams. Pretty painful. He wasn't very happy afterwards. This will be the make or break year for baseball, I think.
Tarzan's reading, and greatly enjoying, the "Captain Underpants" books. I managed to steer Scooby away from them, but no such luck with Mr. Independence! He decided to strip down yesterday and BE Captain Underpants for awhile. Of course, he's been doing that for awhile...
Thursday, February 26, 2009
Grace, part 2
1. I received an acceptance into Savannah College of Art and Design's MFA in Performing Arts program. Not sure if I want to go there, but it's nice to be wanted.
2. My house has been very peaceful and quiet today. It's nice.
3. An article Scooby co-wrote was published in the local paper today. He'll be thrilled!
4. Tarzan has a playdate today. He's already thrilled.
5. After tonight, all the songs for Beauty and the Beast will be choreographed - now we just have to review them. Over and over again.
2. My house has been very peaceful and quiet today. It's nice.
3. An article Scooby co-wrote was published in the local paper today. He'll be thrilled!
4. Tarzan has a playdate today. He's already thrilled.
5. After tonight, all the songs for Beauty and the Beast will be choreographed - now we just have to review them. Over and over again.
Wednesday, February 25, 2009
Grace in small things
1. The sun is shining, and I actually had to switch the settings in my car from heat to vent.
2. I cashed my teensy tiny paycheck and it was enough to cover a week's worth of groceries.
3. All three kids, although somewhat coughy and sneezy are well enough to go to school.
4. Scooby brought home three tests last week, all with a score of 100%
5. My finger, although itchy and ugly, is healing quickly
As today is the first day of Lent, I'm going to attempt to write something in this blog every day, even if it's "only" a list of things to be grateful for. I'm going to attempt to focus on the positive, and reignite my awarenesss of the blessings in my life.
Not to say that there won't still be days of venting and complaining.
But I'm going to try, in this season of reflection, to be more present, more transparent, and more grateful.
We'll see how it goes.
2. I cashed my teensy tiny paycheck and it was enough to cover a week's worth of groceries.
3. All three kids, although somewhat coughy and sneezy are well enough to go to school.
4. Scooby brought home three tests last week, all with a score of 100%
5. My finger, although itchy and ugly, is healing quickly
As today is the first day of Lent, I'm going to attempt to write something in this blog every day, even if it's "only" a list of things to be grateful for. I'm going to attempt to focus on the positive, and reignite my awarenesss of the blessings in my life.
Not to say that there won't still be days of venting and complaining.
But I'm going to try, in this season of reflection, to be more present, more transparent, and more grateful.
We'll see how it goes.
Tuesday, February 24, 2009
Saturday, February 21, 2009
Friday, February 20, 2009
Limbo, con't
Who thought up these lyrics?????
Get you super, Limbo Girl!
Give they check to Limbo World!
There’s a Limbo Moon above,
You will fall in Limbo love!
Jack, be Limbo! Jack, be quick!
Jack, go under Limbo stick!
All around the Limbo Club!
Hey, let’s do the Limbo Rock!
Ahahahou!
Get you super, Limbo Girl!
Give they check to Limbo World!
There’s a Limbo Moon above,
You will fall in Limbo love!
Jack, be Limbo! Jack, be quick!
Jack, go under Limbo stick!
All around the Limbo Club!
Hey, let’s do the Limbo Rock!
Ahahahou!
Thursday, February 19, 2009
Limbo
I feel like I'm in a state of limbo, waiting for these schools to get back to me. For the past three weeks, I've been in a place of having done everything that I can do to expedite the process, and am merely waiting for the judgement to fall.
Limbo
1.
(often initial capital letter) Roman Catholic Theology. a region on the border of hell or heaven, serving as the abode after death of unbaptized infants (limbo of infants) and of the righteous who died before the coming of Christ (limbo of the fathers or limbo of the patriarchs).
2.
a place or state of oblivion to which persons or things are regarded as being relegated when cast aside, forgotten, past, or out of date: My youthful hopes are in the limbo of lost dreams.
3.
an intermediate, transitional, or midway state or place.
4.
a place or state of imprisonment or confinement.
5.
a dance from the West Indies, originally for men only, in which the dancer bends backward from the knees and moves with a shuffling step under a horizontal bar that is lowered after each successive pass.
Out of the above definitions, the one that I was thinking of when I thought "limbo" was number 3, a transitional or midway state. Neither here, nor there. Incapable of making future plans, or investing in present circumstances. However, upon reflection, number 4 also seems to fit. Also, number 5. Bending backwards, shuffling, as the bar is lowered.
Ouch.
Limbo
1.
(often initial capital letter) Roman Catholic Theology. a region on the border of hell or heaven, serving as the abode after death of unbaptized infants (limbo of infants) and of the righteous who died before the coming of Christ (limbo of the fathers or limbo of the patriarchs).
2.
a place or state of oblivion to which persons or things are regarded as being relegated when cast aside, forgotten, past, or out of date: My youthful hopes are in the limbo of lost dreams.
3.
an intermediate, transitional, or midway state or place.
4.
a place or state of imprisonment or confinement.
5.
a dance from the West Indies, originally for men only, in which the dancer bends backward from the knees and moves with a shuffling step under a horizontal bar that is lowered after each successive pass.
Out of the above definitions, the one that I was thinking of when I thought "limbo" was number 3, a transitional or midway state. Neither here, nor there. Incapable of making future plans, or investing in present circumstances. However, upon reflection, number 4 also seems to fit. Also, number 5. Bending backwards, shuffling, as the bar is lowered.
Ouch.
Tuesday, February 17, 2009
It seemed like a good idea at the time...
See, there was this hunk of heavy styrofoam that was roughly shaped like a half of a watermelon, and they needed a watermelon costume, so how perfect is that? But it was heavy, and kind of too big, so we were going to cut it in half, length-wise. So we tried a hand saw, and yeah, that was working, but they're only fourth graders and not very strong, so it took about 20 minutes to cut down a quarter of an inch, and we had about 2 feet to go. So then we tried hedge clippers, but they didn't do anything. So I got out the small chainsaw that we have for tree limbs. I figured, other parents let their kids use power tools, under supervision. We were really careful, and I showed them how to turn it on and off, and had everyone else stand way back, but SOMEONE had to hold the styrofoam steady, and a kid sure couldn't do it, and...
Anyway, no one else got hurt, the styrofoam got cut, and it makes quite a nice watermelon. In retrospect, we probably should have found another way, but it DID work. And my finger will heal.
Warning...graphic picture below.
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Monday, February 16, 2009
Happy President's Day
Mine will be spent much as my Valentine's Day was...in full Mommy mode. V-Day, I took Scooby to a "Spontaneous Fun Day" at his school - to practice sponteous problems for Odyssey of the Mind. I know, it's an oxymoron. And they still haven't learned to build tall towers out of random materials. No structural engineers in this group. Then, I took Cinderella to buy a birthday present for her friend and dropped her off at the party. Then we picked her up and went to the library to renew Scooby's Battle of the Books reading selection. Hm...it's kind of a blur after that. Today, I have Beauty and the Beast rehearsal and then a LONG Odyssey meeting where we be exploring the comparative merits of liquid nails, hot glue, and sewing. I'm tired already, just thinking about it. I spent all night dreaming about subway card machines that wouldn't give me change and leaving baby strollers in the middle of the street. A tribute, I think, to both Steve and Melissa. It shows you're on my mind!
Monday, February 09, 2009
Holes
This is what the hole in our bedroom floor looked like.
For about 8 months now, we've noticed a significant dip in the floor (underneath the carpet) in our bedroom, right in the middle of the room. It was very hard to avoid. It was also, I noticed one day when I was downstairs, directly above the chandelier in the dining room. (Or what we call "the blue room" since we don't have any dining room furniture in it.) It appeared rather suddenly, and the kids, despite being threatened with a river dunking, enjoyed jumping into it. I had great trepidation about this hole, and even had dreams about it being filled with swarming termites chewing their way through our house. We didn't quite know how to go about exploring the problem, however, as we have wall-to-wall Berber (sp?) carpeting, and a very small bedroom crammed full of heavy furniture. Finally, Don sweet-talked a carpet-laying friend of his to come over and take a look. This meant the day before I had to clear off my dresser (no mean feat), carry all the drawers into the boy's room, take all the storage boxes from under the bed into the boy's room, strip the bed and put the blankets and comforter in the boy's room, put the end-of-the-bed bench into the boy's room, and hope like hell they wouldn't have to move my huge shelving unit, since I had loaded it up with everything from off the dresser. That morning, Don and I moved the mattresses into the boy's room, disassembled the bed, pulled the dresser into the hall...no wonder my back still hurts! So anyway, the guy came and pulled back the carpet, and it was no big deal. A small support piece had come off (the nail bent) and two pieces of the hardwood had dropped down. Nail the support back on, replace the boards, problem solved. Then, the best part, the guy fixed the carpet - by "kicking" it back into place. I don't know how many of you have ever seen a carpet being "kicked" but MAN, does it look painful. There's this tool that stretches the carpet flat, then you jam the end of it with your knee and it pushes the carpet under the baseboards. He did both walls in about 5 minutes. It was really something to see. So for the rest of the day I vacuumed places that haven't seen the light of day in 5 years, washed sheets and blankets, and put the room back together. Not a bad day's work.
Monday, February 02, 2009
GroundHog Day
Stupid groundhog.
Anyway, here's a recap of my trip to NY. Here's what I know for sure now, that I didn't before I left. I'm not going to Yale. I'm not going to any of the other schools that I didn't specifically apply to (the ones that showed up for the URTAs). New York actually can be fun to visit. Especially when you can stay for free with your brother and he buys you all your meals.
I flew out on Saturday in a tiny little plane that made me slightly airsick during landing. We had a powerful tailwind and arrived 40 minutes ahead of schedule. Not bad for a flight that should have taken an hour and a half! I took a cab from LaGuardia to the corner of 87th and 3rd, then stood outside in a freezing gale for what seemed like 20 minutes waiting for Steve. (It was probably about 3 minutes, but it was really cold!) We settled in to his apartment and he promptly got me hooked on past episodes of "LOST", a show I swore I'd never watch, since it seemed such a pain to understand. And yes, it is, but I also enjoyed it a lot. After feeling like a slug for awhile, I dragged Steve outside to show me his neighborhood.
On Sunday, I took the Metro-North railroad from Grand Central up to New Haven. I decided to walk from Union Station to the Yale campus, which went fine after only one short stint of walking the wrong way for about 6 blocks. I found the campus and called my friend Cassie, arranging to meet up after the audition. I was still a couple of hours early, so I found a nice vegetarian place for lunch and had some hummus, falafel, tabouli, and baba ganoush. I think I mostly spelled those right. And no, I still don't know what baba ganoush is, but the falafel was really delicious. So then I had my Yale audition. There were 16 of us assigned to the 2:00 hour. We met with the auditioners (two of the heads of the MFA drama program) to hear that they were really very nice people, and if we don't make it don't take it personally, and yadda yadda. The same speech I was to hear about six times over the course of the week. We then went in one at a time and did our two contrasting monologues in four minutes or less, and then waited for the end of the hour callbacks to be posted. Then there were to be end of the day callbacks, and then another round of callbacks at the end of February. I have two friends who auditioned for the Directing program in past years, and both were called back several times, and both ended up not being accepted into the program. So I decided that if they weren't going to accept me, I'd rather know right away rather than being put through the suspense. So, they obliged me by not even asking me to the end of the hour callbacks. And, although I was of course disappointed not to even make it past the first round, I was glad that the decision came sooner rather than later, and I can definitely cross Yale off the maybe list. If only I could get my $100 application fee back.
Anyway, next I met up with Cassie and we went out for a bite to eat.
Monday I had the audition for Brown. I applied to both the acting and directing programs, and so had separate auditions and interviews for each. I met with the head of the MFA Directing program first, and I think it went okay, except I didn't have any "supporting materials" with me and I think she expected me to. Things such as photos from shows, press clippings, director's notes, etc. First of all, I don't have many of those, and secondly, I didn't really want to lug them to New York for one interview. It said such material was welcome, but not necessary. So anyway, we talked about the program, and what my vision of theater is, and what hers is, and a lot about motherhood (she has two children, ages three and five.) I think we hit it off personally, but I don't think I impressed her professionally. They only accept two people into the directing program. Next I auditioned for the heads of the MFA Acting program, and did my two contrasting monologues in under three minutes, and chatted with them for a bit. They were very nice, and seemed to like the audition. Two hours later there was an orientation meeting where they explained about the program. They are big into collaboration and the making of the "whole theater artist", so I think it's a plus that I applied to both programs. I REALLY liked the sound of the program, and would love to be accepted there. That said, I'm trying to remain expectation free. I should hear from them one way or the other by the end of February.
After I was done there, I walked around a little by Central Park,
spent some time in FAO Schwartz, 
and window shopped on Madison Ave.
Then Steve and Sue and I went out to dinner at a nice French place where I had scallops and leeks, and a really nice wine.
Tuesday was the Screening audition for the URTAs. There were about 75 people there for the orientation meeting, and we each auditioned for two judges (two contrasting monologues in under 3 minutes) who determined whether or not you were worthy to be seen by the actual representatives from the 30 or so schools that attend. I ran into someone from the murder mysteries that I've worked with, and it was nice to see a familiar face! I was, again, one of the oldest people in the room. That was a theme for the whole week, by the way. 99 percent of the women seemed to be right out of undergrad school. The men had a few older looking representatives, but most were still in their twenties. At the screening audition, I saw one women who looked slightly older than me, and one man who was a lot older. He warmed up by doing Tai Chi in the middle of the room. The orientation was at 8:30 and my audition was at 11:30. Then we had to come back tor the results at 5:00. After my audition, I went back to Steve's and fell asleep. I'd had every intention of getting some packing done for him, but I guess I was tired! So I went back at 5:00 to get my results and was very happy to see I'd been passed on to the final auditions! (The guy I knew from Pittsburgh was not.) That was a good night.
Then Steve and I and his friend Lauren went to a barbecue place for dinner, and then met up with Sue for dessert at a German place, where she was hit on by a very drunk guy at the bar. He liked her glasses. And her stylllle. We had chocolate fondue. Yummy!
Wednesday was another 8:30 call for orientation for the Final URTA auditions. Mine was at 9:52, and the results would be in at three. I had coffee at Starbucks with a nice girl from New Haven named Iris (whose first choice school is Yale). She was one of the "older" women - 25. It was slushy and rainy on Wednesday, and NOT very fun to try to walk around, but I decided to stick it out, and walked over to the Museum of Modern Art for awhile. And I decided, yeah, I really still don't like most modern art. But it was cool to see the actual Andy Warhols:
So I went back for the results at 3:00, and received a disappointment. The schools that are interested in you schedule an interview that day at the hotel. So you don't know until your receive your results whether you'll be seeing no one, or a whole slew of people keeping you there until late in the evening. It is for these interviews that you are supposed to bring 10 copies of your headshot, resume, and school transcript. I received one request for an interview, from the University of Wisconsin. And there were two other people there with me. I think they called back everyone, in order to try to recruit people to their school, because, let's face it, it's in Wisconsin. So that was disappointing. Not that there were any schools there that I was dying to go to, but there were several I was at least interested in, and if anyone was going to do the turning down, I wanted it to be me!
That night, I went back to Steve's and DID do some packing, ordered pizza again, and watched more "LOST". I flew out Thursday morning and got home without incident.
Overall, it was a good trip. I enjoyed the sights of New York
So whatever works out, I'm along for the ride. I should know within about six weeks what all the schools I actually applied to decide, and I'll go from there.
Onwards!
Thursday, January 29, 2009
Oh, yes.
Friday, January 23, 2009
The glamorous life
Not much exciting going on here...just trying to run down the list of errands before I leave tomorrow. Return library books, print out itinerary for Don of my activities and the kid's activities. Double check babysitting arrangements and rides to activities for kids. Get copies of headshots made(a pain in the butt, but too boring to elaborate on). Mail some long overdue forms. Try to burn into my brain where I have to be and when and what form of public transit I'm taking to get there. I have phone numbers of two friends from college, one in NY and one in CT that I'm going to try to connect with while I'm gone, I hope that works out. Clean the fish tank. Pick up Scooby's new glasses. Organize my clothes. Go to the bank. Exciting!!!
Today I'm packing and cleaning the dentist office, getting a travel book from the library, and making another trip to the post office. My flight is tomorrow at 11:30! Pray for me - or at least do what they say in England...hold your thumbs for me!
Today I'm packing and cleaning the dentist office, getting a travel book from the library, and making another trip to the post office. My flight is tomorrow at 11:30! Pray for me - or at least do what they say in England...hold your thumbs for me!
Friday, January 16, 2009
Brr
I suppose it will sound redundant to most of the country to admit that it's cold here. Freezing. Quite a bit below freezing, actually. Like minus 2 degrees. Now, I know in Norwood, that's backyard barbeque weather, but here it's kind of a shock to the system. Thankfully, our furnace works, the car has been starting and the heater for the one remaining fish in the tank hasn't conked out. Despite these blessings, however, it's pretty freaking miserable. The kids' hands and lips are all chapped, the cat is incredibly cranky, and I'm about ready to sign up with any school south of the border. Winter sucks.
Don is away for the weekend on a guy's camping trip with 5 of his friends. Fortunately, it's wussy camping, in a heated cabin with cigars and beer. Hopefully he'll have fun. His Christmas vacation was kind of defeated by the coughing and hacking. Then next week, I'm off to NYC for my auditions!
Can I mention briefly how freaked out I am? I was totally planning on losing 20 pounds by this time, and getting in a couple more monologue coaching sessions. Oh well. Stress-eating demolished the 20 pound plan, and financial woes nixed the coaching sessions. I'm trying to just view it as a fun trip to visit Steve, (and help him pack...) with a side of a few insignificant auditions along the way. Que sera sera.
On the home front, Cinderella's front teeth are coming in nicely, Tarzan's been bumped up another reading group level at school, and Scooby's considering entering a Shakespeare monologue and scene contest. (He's not being influenced in that decision at all. Ha ha.)
Time for a possett and a hot water bottle.
Don is away for the weekend on a guy's camping trip with 5 of his friends. Fortunately, it's wussy camping, in a heated cabin with cigars and beer. Hopefully he'll have fun. His Christmas vacation was kind of defeated by the coughing and hacking. Then next week, I'm off to NYC for my auditions!
Can I mention briefly how freaked out I am? I was totally planning on losing 20 pounds by this time, and getting in a couple more monologue coaching sessions. Oh well. Stress-eating demolished the 20 pound plan, and financial woes nixed the coaching sessions. I'm trying to just view it as a fun trip to visit Steve, (and help him pack...) with a side of a few insignificant auditions along the way. Que sera sera.
On the home front, Cinderella's front teeth are coming in nicely, Tarzan's been bumped up another reading group level at school, and Scooby's considering entering a Shakespeare monologue and scene contest. (He's not being influenced in that decision at all. Ha ha.)
Time for a possett and a hot water bottle.
Tuesday, January 13, 2009
Friday, January 09, 2009
Movies Becki will not be seeing in 2009
I have stolen, um, I mean, borrowed the following entry from my friend Becki. Actually I asked her permission first, so it's not really stealing at all. Read it and see why she is my friend. I like to surround myself with funny people!
Movies I Will Not Be Seeing in 2009
Well, here we are, on the cusp of a new year, and you know what that means! That’s right! The media telling us what we’re going to like for the next twelve months! Following my perusal of several “must see” movie-lists, I’ve come up with my own “must not see” list.
After all, a girl’s got to stand up to the man.
1. My Bloody Valentine, 3D. If you have ever had the good fortune to spend more than 30 seconds with me, you know that I am a huge chicken. The line between “fear” and “fun” is very thick, well defined, and guarded with electric fence.
And barbed wire.
And gnomes, with guns.
I have never been able to comprehend the phrase “It’s not scary! It’s FUNNY!” How can you possibly get those two things confused?! “It’s not scary, it’s ALLEGORY!”, okay. “It’s not scary, it’s a DOCUMENTARY.” Sure. I’ll even go so far as “It’s not scary, it’s a METAPHOR FOR THE ROLE CULTURAL RELATIVISM PLAYS IN THE DOWNWARD SPIRAL OF CIVILIZATION.” But funny?! No.
I could spend all day complaining about why horror movies are not entertainment, but I know that some of you make your living as the voice of serial killer Vic Towbridge in “Exit Speed” (out on DVD now!). So I’ll just sum it up and say that just thinking about a horror movie in 3D makes me want to curl into the fetal position, and I can do that for free in my own home, thank you very much.
2. Fast and Furious. Am I delirious, or was this movie already made? Let me check the ol’ IMDB.com….hmmmm….yes. Yes, it was, only it had a few “ands” and “thes” that are now absent from this brilliantly concise title.
I have a few questions about this whole franchise. If you can answer them, please. Enlighten me. First of all, I would like to know who is seeing these movies. Single men? Frustrated married men? Single women trolling for lonely single men? Mechanics? Vin Diesel’s mother? Whoever they are, they must be stopped. Next, I would like to know if Vin Diesel’s last name had anything to do with his acquisition of this Role Of A Lifetime. I mean, it’s a car movie. And his last name’s Diesel. That would be like David Spade being in that “Holes” movie from a few years back.
You with me? Anyone laugh at that? No? Okay, moving on.
3. The Pink Panther 2. Let me just clear this up: I love Steve Martin. Love him. With the intensity of a thousand suns. And I also love stupid comedy. I mean, come on. I’m a Toth. It’s in our genetic makeup. But this…this is asking too much.
Steve Martin and a cast of commendable actors who clearly owe Steve Martin huge favors (perhaps he donated organs to their children?) run around and solve crime. Whatev. But you know what really gets me? Steve Martin’s girlfriend in this movie (Emily Mortimer) is, in real life, 26 years younger than him. Let the record show that if I was dating someone who was 26 years younger than me, I’d be escorting a 3rd grader on his field trip to Old Economy.
Twenty six years. Sheesh. Where I come from, that’s two generations.
4. Bride Wars. This really isn’t fair. I wouldn’t see this no matter who was starring in it, but the fact that it’s starring Anne Hathaway (who reminds me of a brunette Ronald McDonald) pushes this over the precipitous edge. I get it, I get it. Girls who are getting married morph into Mothra, and will eat your face off if you catch them on a bad day.
To be honest, I’m not a fan of the romantic comedy in general (with a small number of notable exceptions), and one could probably make a compelling case about my distaste for rom-coms and my general cynicism toward all things mushy being in direct proportion. But honestly? Are we doing women any favors with movies like this? Do men really need one more reason to think we’re cranky, overly emotional, and irrational? Or am I just thinking too much?
5. Land of the Lost. Oh. Em. Gee. People, only one thing terrified me more as a child than the army of Oompa Loompas in "Willy Wonka", and that is the Saturday morning television program, "Land of the Lost". A little history for you Becki-Buffs--Saturday mornings in my house were piano lessons for my mom. My siblings and I were permitted in the TV room ONLY during this time--apparently, we were "loud", "distracting", and "incredibly annoying". Anyway, once my siblings latched onto the fact that I hated this show, I was forced to watch it every freaking week. All channel changes must be democratically decided, of course, and I was outvoted 2-1 every time.
As some of you know, I have a paralyzing fear of dinosaurs. I had to leave "Jurassic Park" because I thought I was going to have a nervous breakdown. I blame this show--even with it's lousy special effects, it did the trick and scared the crap outta me.
I read an interview with Will Farrell yesterday (he is starring in this movie, along with a bunch of people I've never heard of) in which he makes this comment:
"We thought it was better served if it errs more on the side of 'Jurassic Park' in terms of realism, and the dinosaurs are just scary as s---, and the comedy plays off of that. You're not going to see the zipper up the back of the Sleestaks' costumes."
Are you kidding me with this? I'd have to be hospitalized. No thanks.
And that, folks, ends not only our list of "Movies I Will Not Be Seeing In 2009", but also a sublist:
"Reasons Why Becki Will Die Alone In A Trailer Full Of Cats". Thanks for joining us.
Movies I Will Not Be Seeing in 2009
Well, here we are, on the cusp of a new year, and you know what that means! That’s right! The media telling us what we’re going to like for the next twelve months! Following my perusal of several “must see” movie-lists, I’ve come up with my own “must not see” list.
After all, a girl’s got to stand up to the man.
1. My Bloody Valentine, 3D. If you have ever had the good fortune to spend more than 30 seconds with me, you know that I am a huge chicken. The line between “fear” and “fun” is very thick, well defined, and guarded with electric fence.
And barbed wire.
And gnomes, with guns.
I have never been able to comprehend the phrase “It’s not scary! It’s FUNNY!” How can you possibly get those two things confused?! “It’s not scary, it’s ALLEGORY!”, okay. “It’s not scary, it’s a DOCUMENTARY.” Sure. I’ll even go so far as “It’s not scary, it’s a METAPHOR FOR THE ROLE CULTURAL RELATIVISM PLAYS IN THE DOWNWARD SPIRAL OF CIVILIZATION.” But funny?! No.
I could spend all day complaining about why horror movies are not entertainment, but I know that some of you make your living as the voice of serial killer Vic Towbridge in “Exit Speed” (out on DVD now!). So I’ll just sum it up and say that just thinking about a horror movie in 3D makes me want to curl into the fetal position, and I can do that for free in my own home, thank you very much.
2. Fast and Furious. Am I delirious, or was this movie already made? Let me check the ol’ IMDB.com….hmmmm….yes. Yes, it was, only it had a few “ands” and “thes” that are now absent from this brilliantly concise title.
I have a few questions about this whole franchise. If you can answer them, please. Enlighten me. First of all, I would like to know who is seeing these movies. Single men? Frustrated married men? Single women trolling for lonely single men? Mechanics? Vin Diesel’s mother? Whoever they are, they must be stopped. Next, I would like to know if Vin Diesel’s last name had anything to do with his acquisition of this Role Of A Lifetime. I mean, it’s a car movie. And his last name’s Diesel. That would be like David Spade being in that “Holes” movie from a few years back.
You with me? Anyone laugh at that? No? Okay, moving on.
3. The Pink Panther 2. Let me just clear this up: I love Steve Martin. Love him. With the intensity of a thousand suns. And I also love stupid comedy. I mean, come on. I’m a Toth. It’s in our genetic makeup. But this…this is asking too much.
Steve Martin and a cast of commendable actors who clearly owe Steve Martin huge favors (perhaps he donated organs to their children?) run around and solve crime. Whatev. But you know what really gets me? Steve Martin’s girlfriend in this movie (Emily Mortimer) is, in real life, 26 years younger than him. Let the record show that if I was dating someone who was 26 years younger than me, I’d be escorting a 3rd grader on his field trip to Old Economy.
Twenty six years. Sheesh. Where I come from, that’s two generations.
4. Bride Wars. This really isn’t fair. I wouldn’t see this no matter who was starring in it, but the fact that it’s starring Anne Hathaway (who reminds me of a brunette Ronald McDonald) pushes this over the precipitous edge. I get it, I get it. Girls who are getting married morph into Mothra, and will eat your face off if you catch them on a bad day.
To be honest, I’m not a fan of the romantic comedy in general (with a small number of notable exceptions), and one could probably make a compelling case about my distaste for rom-coms and my general cynicism toward all things mushy being in direct proportion. But honestly? Are we doing women any favors with movies like this? Do men really need one more reason to think we’re cranky, overly emotional, and irrational? Or am I just thinking too much?
5. Land of the Lost. Oh. Em. Gee. People, only one thing terrified me more as a child than the army of Oompa Loompas in "Willy Wonka", and that is the Saturday morning television program, "Land of the Lost". A little history for you Becki-Buffs--Saturday mornings in my house were piano lessons for my mom. My siblings and I were permitted in the TV room ONLY during this time--apparently, we were "loud", "distracting", and "incredibly annoying". Anyway, once my siblings latched onto the fact that I hated this show, I was forced to watch it every freaking week. All channel changes must be democratically decided, of course, and I was outvoted 2-1 every time.
As some of you know, I have a paralyzing fear of dinosaurs. I had to leave "Jurassic Park" because I thought I was going to have a nervous breakdown. I blame this show--even with it's lousy special effects, it did the trick and scared the crap outta me.
I read an interview with Will Farrell yesterday (he is starring in this movie, along with a bunch of people I've never heard of) in which he makes this comment:
"We thought it was better served if it errs more on the side of 'Jurassic Park' in terms of realism, and the dinosaurs are just scary as s---, and the comedy plays off of that. You're not going to see the zipper up the back of the Sleestaks' costumes."
Are you kidding me with this? I'd have to be hospitalized. No thanks.
And that, folks, ends not only our list of "Movies I Will Not Be Seeing In 2009", but also a sublist:
"Reasons Why Becki Will Die Alone In A Trailer Full Of Cats". Thanks for joining us.
Thursday, January 08, 2009
Happy 2009!
Yes, it's January, 2009 and I can no longer procrastinate looking at the ever so scary "financial aid" portion of the college application process. The new FAFSA (federal student loan application) is available and at least one of the schools needs it completed by tomorrow. Of course, the information on the FAFSA is dependent on your 2008 tax return, which I cannot yet complete since I've only received one of the forms out of the 5 DIFFERENT ONES I need, and the one that Don needs in order to complete it. So I spent about two hours today trying to fudge my way through completing a tax form so I could at least get some estimated numbers to put into the other form. In the meantime, the other form timed out and I can't currently retrieve it. Which is probably okay, because I have to go pick up the boys in 15 minutes so I can drag all three kids to a production meeting for Beauty and the Beast. Then we'll return home, I'll fix dinner, nag them to do their homework, do baths, and try to get them to bed so I can finish the freaking form in time to watch the new episode of Grey's Anatomy. On the plus side, I'm way ahead in terms of completing our taxes.
I'll write more about the holidays at another time, when I'm not so crabby. They truly were wonderful, despite the bronchitis.
ps: 8:45pm There. It's done. Stupid forms.
I'll write more about the holidays at another time, when I'm not so crabby. They truly were wonderful, despite the bronchitis.
ps: 8:45pm There. It's done. Stupid forms.
Monday, December 22, 2008
Merry Merry!
Tonight we had Christmas at the Dunlaps - and much merriment ensued. Also some angst, a few tears, a toothache and far too much consumption of sweets. All in all, a good party. We did our annual White Elephant gift exchange - and Scooby ended up choosing one of the gifts I'd brought, much to his chagrin and everyone else's amusement. Tarzan got a 2 foot bottle of vinegar and peppers shaped like the Eiffel Tower, and a birdhouse kit. Cinderella was my designated helper, and she picked out a bag for holding stuff in the car - quite a sophisticated choice, if I do say so myself.
Tomorrow we pack feverishly while the kids enjoy their school Christmas parties, and then head off to Mass. - all in one go if the DVD player and weather both cooperate. I don't anticipate much posting while we're gone, since most of the people who read this will be in Mass. with me, so while we're away, let me wish everyone a Merry Christmas, a better 2009 than 2008 turned out to be, and a few moments of peace amongst the parties.
Tomorrow we pack feverishly while the kids enjoy their school Christmas parties, and then head off to Mass. - all in one go if the DVD player and weather both cooperate. I don't anticipate much posting while we're gone, since most of the people who read this will be in Mass. with me, so while we're away, let me wish everyone a Merry Christmas, a better 2009 than 2008 turned out to be, and a few moments of peace amongst the parties.
Thursday, December 18, 2008
Acceptance Number One
VCU in Richmond sent me an acceptance letter today! Yay!
But I won't find out about other schools until March....hm.
But I won't find out about other schools until March....hm.
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